These are fathers, not strangers

I consider myself very lucky. I have two of the greatest little kids in the world and their daddy is such a loving and generous man. He works hard and always makes sure that we have everything we need. Even though he calls me when I'm out by myself to find out what to give the kids for dinner or leaves toothpaste in the sink, I couldn't be happier about the husband and father he is. I know there are many women out there who have to deal with deadbeat dads, who don't pay child support or many times don't even want to be a part of their children's lives. I am glad to know that our legal system makes a decent effort to bring these poor excuses for parents to light and makes them accountable.

But what about the sorry excuses for women who are the custodial parent and continue to demand money from the child's father or refuses to work amicably with the father on issues regarding the child? Too often, these women will limit or refuse the father's visitation even after a court order. Many times the fathers cannot depend on the courts to help, as the courts continue to side with the mother, allow venues to be changed, or even leave cases going on for years. These women are rarely forced to share parenting time or made to cooperate so that the child can have both parents in their lives. Fathers tend to give up after awhile because they are tired of fighting for their rights or cannot afford to keep fighting a custodial mother who refuses to obey the courts anyway.

These loving fathers genuinely want to be a part of their children's lives. They aren't in it for financial gain or another selfish motive, but because they want to be a part of their child's life. I guarantee these fathers would take their child in a minute to live with them, even if there wasn't child support involved!

It's really sad to witness these kids almost be held ransom by their "mothers" who are too selfish to see that the child needs both parents! Maybe they claim that they know what is best for the child, but how can the best interest be to keep them from their father. Even if these mothers claim they don't keep the father out of the child's life, if things are not exactly on their terms, then the father is not going to see or speak to the child. PERIOD!

Any smart person can see that the mother is not setting a good example for her children if she demonstrates a lack of respect for the other parent, demonstrates her selfishness by not helping with visitation (timing or transportation) and shows her greediness by saying the child support is not enough. Which I find very funny because these women seem to think the non-custodial parent is the primary monetary source to provide for the child. But then most times the father's aren't even included on the decisions regarding their child.

But what is being done to stop these women? Not a lot. Children need their fathers too. There are so many rights out there that people fight for, so why are there so few supporting our non-custodial parents and the children they rarely get to see? Why must these father's jump through hoops just to get their rights warranted? Are father's rights less important than the mother's? And what about these poor children who believe that their dads don't want any part of their lives because their mother's have cleverly clouded their judgement. These are fathers, not strangers. These women need to stop trying to play the protective mother, because all they are really doing is hurting these chidren!

I have too many friends who have dealt with these same issues. Some are the father's, some are the children of divorced parents, some are the girlfrends, some are the new wives... All I know is that it is a sad, sad thing...