Friday, April 18, 2008
Why?
glitter-graphics.com
Death is a reminder that there are few things in this life that we have control over. But we do have control over choices we make. We can choose to focus on the good and positive and remember all the gifts that the Lord has brought into our lives. Yes, you might want to curse God because he took someone you love so dearly and sometimes carrying on is hard. I know there is a part of yourself that goes with your loved one that died and in some ways you feel like you are being cheated. But the Lord would never cheat you. Tomorrow is another day and another gift from God. Long before my dad ever had cancer, he greeted EVERY SINGLE DAY with a smile and demonstrated his love for others every chance he got. He continued to do so, even after the diagnosis and he knew he would surely die. I try to do the same.
Tomorrow I will smile again, but today I am sad. The news of another sweet soul losing their life to cancer is making my heart ache for those families having to deal with losing their loved one. It's not as close to home as the last two times but it still has an effect on me since someone I love is hurting because of it. I have sat down and prayed for her and the family. She is too far away to hug, so all I can do is write these words and remind her that the Lord is near...
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
All this leads me to think about the last 36 hours of my dads life... as if it is really all that far from my mind. We arrived at my parents' home on that Thursday in Jul '06 and by Friday evening my dad was gone. To this day I am convinced that he was hanging in there, waiting for me. The communication was minimal on that Thursday, but dad was still responding as we held hands and he repeated some of the things I was saying. I remember his eyes looking directly into mine and him saying "thank goodness you made it".
He knew it wouldn't be long. We weren't sure, we just were following the lead of the hospice nurse and prayed for a peaceful ending to a long battle with the ugly monster called cancer. Friday was frightful as we witnessed what the body does as it begins it's demise to death. It seemed as though he was already gone as his body shut down and he was doing the "death moan" as I call it. But I was so sure he could hear as I sang hymns and read some bible verses. I was the last person to give him his dose of morphine so that he could rest peacefully. It had to be comforting for him to have a house full of people who cared and were nearby for mom and I. Although I was not there in the room holding his hand when he died, I was glad I was there to say goodbye. He knew I was there close by and that's what matters to me. This helped me deal with his death... being there. I don't know how I would of coped not being there to say goodbye for the last time.
If we trust in God, we can take life as it comes. There is no denying that we have troubles. I learned from my dad that we just have to deal with things one day at a time. But he also taught me that it is God who gives us the strength each day to deal with life's challenges. We should always go to Him in times of need and that we must also bow down in thankfulness for all that God has given us. Praise the Lord, He is so good!!!!
Blessings K I love you!
"In a beautiful blue lagoon on a clear day, a fine sailing ship spreads its brilliant white canvas in a fresh morning breeze sails out to the open sea.
We watch her glide away magnificently through the deep blue and gradually see her grow smaller and smaller as she nears the horizon.
Finally, where the sea and sky meet, she slips silently from sight; and someone near me says, 'There, she is gone!'
Gone where? Gone from sight, that is all.
She is still as large in mast and hull and sail, still just as able to bear her load. And we can be sure that, just as we say, 'There, she is gone!' another says, 'There, she comes!!!' "
--- Unknown
Why?
glitter-graphics.com
Death is a reminder that there are few things in this life that we have control over. But we do have control over choices we make. We can choose to focus on the good and positive and remember all the gifts that the Lord has brought into our lives. Yes, you might want to curse God because he took someone you love so dearly and sometimes carrying on is hard. I know there is a part of yourself that goes with your loved one that died and in some ways you feel like you are being cheated. But the Lord would never cheat you. Tomorrow is another day and another gift from God. Long before my dad ever had cancer, he greeted EVERY SINGLE DAY with a smile and demonstrated his love for others every chance he got. He continued to do so, even after the diagnosis and he knew he would surely die. I try to do the same.
Tomorrow I will smile again, but today I am sad. The news of another sweet soul losing their life to cancer is making my heart ache for those families having to deal with losing their loved one. It's not as close to home as the last two times but it still has an effect on me since someone I love is hurting because of it. I have sat down and prayed for her and the family. She is too far away to hug, so all I can do is write these words and remind her that the Lord is near...
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
All this leads me to think about the last 36 hours of my dads life... as if it is really all that far from my mind. We arrived at my parents' home on that Thursday in Jul '06 and by Friday evening my dad was gone. To this day I am convinced that he was hanging in there, waiting for me. The communication was minimal on that Thursday, but dad was still responding as we held hands and he repeated some of the things I was saying. I remember his eyes looking directly into mine and him saying "thank goodness you made it".
He knew it wouldn't be long. We weren't sure, we just were following the lead of the hospice nurse and prayed for a peaceful ending to a long battle with the ugly monster called cancer. Friday was frightful as we witnessed what the body does as it begins it's demise to death. It seemed as though he was already gone as his body shut down and he was doing the "death moan" as I call it. But I was so sure he could hear as I sang hymns and read some bible verses. I was the last person to give him his dose of morphine so that he could rest peacefully. It had to be comforting for him to have a house full of people who cared and were nearby for mom and I. Although I was not there in the room holding his hand when he died, I was glad I was there to say goodbye. He knew I was there close by and that's what matters to me. This helped me deal with his death... being there. I don't know how I would of coped not being there to say goodbye for the last time.
If we trust in God, we can take life as it comes. There is no denying that we have troubles. I learned from my dad that we just have to deal with things one day at a time. But he also taught me that it is God who gives us the strength each day to deal with life's challenges. We should always go to Him in times of need and that we must also bow down in thankfulness for all that God has given us. Praise the Lord, He is so good!!!!
Blessings K I love you!
"In a beautiful blue lagoon on a clear day, a fine sailing ship spreads its brilliant white canvas in a fresh morning breeze sails out to the open sea.
We watch her glide away magnificently through the deep blue and gradually see her grow smaller and smaller as she nears the horizon.
Finally, where the sea and sky meet, she slips silently from sight; and someone near me says, 'There, she is gone!'
Gone where? Gone from sight, that is all.
She is still as large in mast and hull and sail, still just as able to bear her load. And we can be sure that, just as we say, 'There, she is gone!' another says, 'There, she comes!!!' "
--- Unknown
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